Bernie bros surprised, delighted, to learn Hillarycare premised on universal coverage

LANSING -- Bernie Bros were shocked Tuesday to learn President Hillary Rodham Clinton pioneered universal health care as far back as the 1990s - literally decades before Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders adopted "Hillarycare" as his platform during the his 2016 primary campaign.

"I found it difficult to believe that a career politician like Clinton could have a track record of taking progressive stances," said Chad Sutherland, a 19-year-old economics major at Brown University and self-described "male feminist" who was responsible for producing the hit Youtube video, "Hillary Clinton Supporters are Voting With Their Cunts: She's a Corporate Whore."

"Look, I don't believe anything I read on the Internet. But then last night I read her Wikipedia page. What do you know, she's a fucking progressive visionary!" he said.

White House Press Secretary and former Saturday Night Live cast member Leslie Jones said, "Fuck everyone."