Clinton nominates Michelle and Barack Obama to fill both Supreme Court vacancies

Clinton nominates Michelle and Barack Obama to fill both Supreme Court vacancies

WASHINGTON D.C. - According to White House officials, President Clinton will nominate Michelle Obama and her husband former President Barack Obama to fill the two vacancies on the Supreme Court.

White House aides expect the Obamas to sail through Senate confirmation hearings. Justices Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan reportedly sent the Obamas flowers welcoming them to "the baddest ass court since Reconstruction."

In a press release, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell said Republicans had misgivings about Barack Obama's qualifications for the position. "On the one hand, he edited the Harvard Law Review. On the other hand, the Harvard Law Review is shariah law," he said. "That said, I would love to see Michelle wear the hell out of that robe."

Justice Clarence Thomas told court clerks he doubted black lawyers could preside on the Supreme Court "while actually black."

ISIS downplays Hillary Clinton’s historic feminist presidency as "tiny setback" to male supremacist cause: "Guys, we can still win this"

ISIS downplays Hillary Clinton’s historic feminist presidency as "tiny setback" to male supremacist cause: "Guys, we can still win this"

Bernie bros surprised, delighted, to learn Hillarycare premised on universal coverage

Bernie bros surprised, delighted, to learn Hillarycare premised on universal coverage