Anthony Weiner switches to rotary phone

NEW YORK -- Former congressman and famed iPhone user Anthony Weiner has switched to a rotary phone.

"I just felt it was time," he told reporters. 

The news was met with cheers, elation, and champagne by Democrats across the country, who have long urged the disgraced former politician to "cut off all contact with the rest of the world" and "live under a rock," according to Democratic media strategist David Brock.

Weiner is the former husband of White House Chief of Staff Huma Abedin. White House Press Secretary Leslie Jones told reporters President Hillary Rodham Clinton "has not spoken or talked to Weiner in years, and looks forward to never thinking about him ever again."