Comey's integrity rises to top spot on FBI's most wanted list
WASHINGTON D.C. -- Competition for the top spot on the FBI's Most Wanted list is stiff. But this week, the FBI announced the hunt for James Comey's integrity is the agency's "Number One priority."
According to the agency, the search for Comey's integrity is "urgent, ongoing, and possibly fruitless."
"Sure, we'd like to locate Jason Derek Brown, who's accused of first degree murder and armed robbery, as well as any number of serial killers, child rapists and terrorists. But as law enforcement officers, the democracy will crumble if we don't find Comey's integrity pronto," said FBI spokeswoman Cynthia Owelo.
Comey's integrity went missing in October, when the FBI Director decided to publicly reopen its investigation into President Hillary Rodham Clinton's email server days before the 2016 election, a choice that Owelo acknowledged had "always seemed crazy unconstitutional."
But, she said, Comey's lack of integrity has become more and more worrying in light of new evidence that Comey voluntarily interfered in the campaign in order to undermine Clinton's chances of victory when he knew Russia was also attempting to steal the election from Clinton at that very time.
In the end, Clinton won the election by 3 million votes.
Owelo encouraged any America who spots James Comey's integrity to call the hotline: "1-800-TRA-ITOR."